If you’re considering renewal of wedding vows then you’ve come to the right place! The renewal of your wedding vows is a fantastic opportunity to tell the world how far you’ve come and how committed you remain to each other.
The renewal of your wedding vows needs as much consideration as when you chose the first wedding vows, this is not a decision to take lightly. After all, you’re not just reminding the world, you’re reminding yourself of your love and commitment.
It doesn’t matter what was involved in your first wedding ceremony, the second will be different and yet need to build that first one, your renewal vows can help you to get this right.
Everything you need to know about renewal of wedding vows
Why Consider Renewal of Wedding Vows
Divorce rates are rising thanks, in part, to the changing view of marriage. Unfortunately, many people do not recognize the commitment associated with wedding vows; you’re dedicating your lives to each other no matter what happens.
The fact that you and your partner have recognized the commitment behind your wedding vows and that you have managed to make it works is worth celebrating!
It doesn’t matter if you been married for 5 years, 10 years, or even 50 years, the renewal of wedding vows provides you with an opportunity to share your achievement with the world, or at least your close friends.
Of course, simply being together for so many years is not the only reason to renew your vows. You may have been through a particularly difficult time together and want to celebrate your love again. Or, you may want to do it all again with your children, ensuring they are part of the big day.
It doesn’t matter what you’re reasons are for renewing your wedding vows, or that some will say there is no point. Wedding vows renewal is a great way to recommit to each other, tell the world, and create an excuse for a party.
Is There A Time Limit?
You may be wondering if there is a time limit regarding your wedding vows and when a renewal can be done. In fact, you may be surprised to learn that you can have a renewal ceremony the day after if you wish!
The choice is entirely yours, there are even some couples who like to renew their vows every year on their anniversary.
Don’t forget the simplest reason of all for renewal of wedding vows, the fact that you can now afford the wedding you always dreamed of, but couldn’t afford when you first got married.
The Cost Of Renewal
The bottom line is the same for most things in life, how much does it cost. The renewal of your wedding vows is one of those times that you can reply “how long is a piece of string?”
A modern wedding ceremony can cost in the region of $30,000 but the actual cost will depend on what you have and want to spend. The same is true for your renewal ceremony, it all depends on how big a party you want.
For example, if you want to recreate, or even improve on, your original wedding vows then you are probably going to be spending tens of thousands. But, if you just want a ceremony and a good party, you’ll probably find it costs between $2,000 and $3,000.
The Wedding Vows Renewal Ceremony
The great thing about a renewal of wedding vows is that you don’t need to have an official registrar whether you have the ceremony or not you’re already legally married.
This means there are no real limits on what you can do! You can choose to have the ceremony in your home, the local hall, the woods, or any other venue. All you need is to have permission from your chosen venue, which means asking them if they are comfortable hosting a wedding vows renewal ceremony! There are not many places that will say no to this.
Of course, you’ll still be constrained by the wedding vows you want to state at your renewal. If your plan is to use specific religious vows you’ll need to verify that the venue and the official hosting the ceremony, are comfortable with these.
It is worth noting that hiring an official for your ceremony does more than making it seem more official. It also ensures that none of your guests are tied up in a role instead of enjoying a repeat of your special day.
The ceremony itself can follow any order you like. However, if you’re struggling for inspiration then you may want to consider this format.
The Grand Entrance
When you had your first wedding ceremony you got to walk down the aisle while everyone turned to look at you. If you wish you can do this again, in your original dress or a new one.
You may want to note that most women like to purchase a new wedding dress for the renewal of vows and why not? After all, your tastes have changed and the entrance statement you want to make may not be the same. In fact, it is common for women to wear a simpler version of their wedding dress.
The alternative, because you’re having your wedding vows renewed, is to walk down the aisle together. This is a nice choice is your father is no longer available to ‘give you away’, or you simply wish to show the union you already have.
The Wedding Vows
Although you are renewing your wedding vows this doesn’t mean you have to say the same words as at the first wedding.
You may want to write your own wedding vows for the renewal service, these should express the joy that you’ve experienced since being married, and how you have come through difficulties together.
But, most importantly, any wedding vows should profess the commitment you’re making to be together forever, no matter what. This is the commitment you made at your original wedding ceremony and what you should be celebrating at your renewal ceremony.
A favourite option is to incorporate part or all of the original wedding vows with some additions of your own. This allows you to express your love and commitment while reminding everyone of the original ceremony.
Of course, this is your renewal of wedding vows, there is no right or wrong process regarding your vows, only what suits you best.
It is common to have the rings re-dedicated during the ceremony. This is similar to the original giving of rings but re-uses your original rings. You can choose to purchase new rings that complement your original wedding bands, or you may prefer to have them engraved.
The ceremony is symbolic but, as the rings are also a symbol, this is surprisingly appropriate. The great thing about having your rings engraved is that you have a reminder of your love and commitment with you all the time. You don’t need to shout that to the world, knowing it is true is enough.
Music & Readings
The renewal of wedding vows ceremony doesn’t need an official registrar and, as such, doesn’t have to follow a set pattern. It doesn’t even need to be completed in a certain amount of time. All you have to consider is how your wedding renewal guests will react and cope when your vows last an hour and the ceremony 3 hours!
There is no reason not to introduce music and readings into your renewal ceremony. You’ll want music playing as you walk down the aisle again, it’s also nice to have a close friend or family member do a reading before and after the renewal of wedding vows.
This can be something written by them, although you may want to check it first. Alternatively, it can be one of the many beautiful poems and readings written about love if it brings a lump to your throat you’re on the right track.
The standard approach to wedding vows renewal is:
- Entrance to music similar to a traditional wedding entrance.
- Greetings by the official and a brief explanation of what the wedding renewal ceremony is, the importance of vows, and a little about you, (the happy couple).
- A reading or poem or perhaps some thoughts shared about the bride and groom.
- The wedding vows, there should be some talk by the official regarding the seriousness of this re-commitment and marriage in general.
- Exchange of rings, old or new. You can even try a ring-warming ceremony if you prefer.
- Time for more readings or poems. It is even possible to ask your children to say a few words.
- Space for extras, you may want music playing or give the wedding guests an opportunity to share their own thoughts and memories.
- Walk back down the aisle, symbolically leaving and ‘starting’ your married life together.
Don’t forget there are no strict rules regarding renewal of wedding vows, you can have all the guests follow you down the aisle if you wish! Renewing your wedding vows is a great opportunity to break all the rules.
With the wedding vows completed you’ll be ready to party! You should choose a venue that will allow you to create the theme you’ve always wanted, regardless of whether this is Gothic, romantic, or fancy dress.
The party should follow the same format as your original wedding, this means food, drink, good music, and of course, the first dance.
However, you and your partner know each other so much better this time around, perhaps it’s time to do something a little special for your first dance. You should have the time to practice before you complete the renewal of your wedding vows.
Your guest list will probably be very similar to your original guest list. However, this will depend on how long you have waited to re-do your vows. You may have new friends, children, and other young relatives that have arrived since you said your vows for the first time.
The good news is that this isn’t actually a wedding, it’s a re-commitment of your vows. In short, you don’t need to worry too much about who should be invited to your wedding and the party, instead focus on who you feel is important to witness you re-take your vows.
This is one event you should have complete control over, don’t let others interfere and ruin the re-commitment of your vows to each other.
It’s a sad reality that many couples spend their entire original wedding budget on getting the vows ceremony right and enjoying the party. There is often not enough funds for the honeymoon, or perhaps just a few days away somewhere.
This is also complicated by the fact that many couples have children before they are married, making it harder to get away.
However, re-doing your vows gives you the opportunity to take the honeymoon that you originally missed out on! If you hadn’t thought of this then start budgeting, there are so many places in the world that you could visit, make the most of the opportunity!
Renewing your vows is not something you should do lightly. It is not a means to try and bring you closer and stay together. Instead, you should undertake this type of re-commitment of love because you love each other and want to spend the rest of your lives together, regardless of what happens.
The same level of commitment needs to go into renewing your vows as the original ceremony. If you have this then you’re free to create any type of ceremony, it simply needs to fit your desires and imagination.
That’s the really great thing about renewing wedding vows, you can organize the ceremony how you like, there is no right or wrongs, just what you want.
Perhaps this is the real reason people renew their vows, the opportunity to do it the way they really wanted to first tile around.
Also, check out this guide to choosing the ultimate wedding song.